Been sick lately , so I haven't posted here for a while. I just finished reading a friends blog. He seems to have a problem with overweight people (of which I sadly belong). Now to be quite honest...so do I.Yup I'm a self-hater. But I understand what he says ( though I think he might be verging on going to far. I fear he may have begun the ole binge and purge cycle. I've tried it myself but seem to never get to the purge part.) But we part ways on one issue. He wants less fat people I want more. I want a certain part of our population to be required to be overweight. Who am I talking about?
Convicts. Yup. Why the hell are we paying for these guys to sit in prison, pumping iron and be released in better shape then when the went in. I say take away their weight lifting stuff, limit their exercise. For breakfast , lunch, and dinner give them shakes. Thick, thick shakes. Feed them the fattest food out there. You know those hats that guys wear to baseball games that have two beer cans with straws going into their mouths? Prisoners should be forced to wear them, but instead of beer, put milkshakes in there instead. When a prisoner is shipped to the hold, it should no longer be for a set amount of time. It should be based on how much food he can eat in a set amount of time. When they come up for parole, a inmate should only be released if he has gained a extra 100 to 125 pounds. Think about how better life would be if this were to happen. Not that I care but prison rapes would go way down. It just wouldn't be humanly possible anymore. If we see a fat person ( I mean really fat) we'd know "convict"! The fatter the person the worse the crime. Whoever heard of a 325 pound man fleeing rapidly the scene of the crime? They'd find him half a block away dead of a heart attack. Drive by shootings would be less deadly . For one reason It's hard to shoot straight when eating a big mack. For another reason you can only fit some many fat guys in a car. Plus with all the extra weight the car wont drive as fast.
What would the effect be on people like me? We'd have to loose weight or people would think we are convicts. Granted I only weigh enough for a bounced check or two, or not returning a video tape to the store, but I still wouldn't want people to think I was a criminal.
Any prisoner who reaches 500 pounds automatically released. At that point the states spending too much time feeding these whales. Repeat offenders will most likely die of heart disease in prison. Yup in my world prison would be a much safer place. Perhaps we could turn the whole operation over to McDonalds. Prisoners would be required to wear hamburgler outfits, but as time passes and the convicts gain the weight they can switch to the looser Ronald McDonald outfit..
Cruel punishment? Yup again. I say we don't have enough of it.
The truly sad thing ?
I'm serious.