I'm Going To Party Like It's 1983
Right before the July 4th weekend of 1983 my Mom's brother Charles Died under mysterious circumstances. My brother Steve was convinced that there was some conspiracy at work. However considering that Steve was the man who eyed his lawn Gnomes with caution every morning I didn't pay too much attention to him.
Charles's death meant one thing to me.
Mom and Dad would be leaving to go to his funeral in Missouri. Leaving me alone to watch the Park while they were gone.
Now please don't think too harshly of me. It wasn't that I didn't care about my Uncle passing away. I did.
However I cared more for Kris Fisher, my main summer of the last year. July 4th was the first time I would be seeing her in almost a year.
Kris was 5 foot 10 inches of heaven. She had Long brown hair, Big beautiful brown eyes, and most importantly to a 18 year old boy a body that made every man in the Park stop in his tracks. And for the extended Forth of July weekend it....I mean she, was all mine. And with my parents gone I had my own bachelor pad from which to romance her.
Dad however had other plans.
Right before he left he brought my sister out to stay and "help" me run the Park.
"Dad I don't need any help. This place can almost run itself."
"Nope it too big a weekend. You need help." Rose just smiled at me. I knew I couldn't win this argument. Besides As long as Mom and Dad were gone I could still get away with murder.
The moment Mom and Dad pulled out of the long driveway Rose turned to me and said,"You stay out of my way, I'll stay out of yours."
We shook hands and I ran off down the road to find Kris's parents campsite.
When I had first seen her the last summer I knew I had to have for a girlfriend. (For Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday if I was lucky) The only problem was her Dad.
Mr Fisher was 6 foot 6 , and looked everybit Bigfoot's slightly less hairy little brother. When he first came to the Park everyboy came smelling around his campsite to see his daughter. And everyone was sent running away by him.
I, of course, saw all this so I devised a new strategy where I became his new best friend. I advised him when a better camping spot opened up (I kicked the old campers out.) and asked him if the two cases of beer I found (Liberated from the Park Clubhouse) were his. (He said yes) Soon he was asking if I knew he had a daughter.
"Really? You have a Daughter? I'd like to meet her if you think it's appropriate."
A year later as I ran down the road to her campsite I hoped she still liked me. And more importantly I hoped her Giant of a father still liked me.
It soon became clear she still had feelings for me. And it became clear that somehow over the last year her body had blossomed even more. A great body the year before had now become something like a work of art.
The first thing I said after I saw her was, "Put your bikini on and lets go swimming." Kris, very aware of what her body did to young men put on a very small blue bathing suit. Two minutes after we got into the lake we were making out on the far side of the dock.
We made out all afternoon. We made in the lake. We made out in my car. We made out in the woods. We made out in my battleship canoe. We made out so much my lips were sore.
As early evening fell I asked her if she would like to come back to my house and make out in bedroom, "Where we'd have more privacy." Her reply was more kisses. Then she took me by my hand and led me to my house.
My heart was beating so fast it felt like music.
As we got closer to my house it became clear that was because of the loud music coming from my house.
There were cars parked all around the house with kids coming in and out of it that I'd never seen before. As I walked in I saw a beer can sitting on the front desk. I was amazed at my sister. I might be bringing a hot young woman to my parents house to take her to my bedroom, but I'd never bring beer into Dad's house.
I found Rose in the living room. I told her if Dad found out she was dead meat. Rose looked at Kris and said if Dad found out about the party he'd find out about everything.
I was going to argue with Rose some more when Kris started kissing my ear. Suddenly I thought a party was a lovely idea. I told Rose to have a great time and headed for my bedroom.
I didn't even bother to turn the light on. Kris and I fell into bed and every dream I'd been having of her was about to come true. Her arms wrapped tight around me and I was soon lost in her embrace.
"Do you love me?", she asked.
"Of course I love you", I said. (Hell, I would have said I loved Charles Manson if she had asked me)
"Am I everything you every wanted?"
All I could do was nod. She sat up and asked, "Do you want me to take off my top?"
That was really the silliest thing I ever heard. Of course I wanted her to take off her top. Hell I told her I'd gladly help. She slowly reached around to her back and undid her top.
And just as the bikini top was about to fall I heard, though the roar of the music my Dad's voice scream, "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!?" Kris's eyes opened wide in fear.
In one very fluid movement I leaped off my bed and kicked the screen out of my window. I jumped out onto my back porch. I gestured for Kris to follow me. She came out my window (That damnable top somehow defying gravity and still staying on.) and started running off towards her campsite. Inside I could hear Dad screaming. I jumped back in real quick, unlocked my door and jumped back out. As I was running off the porch I could hear Rose crying, and saying to Dad, "Tom's got a girl in his room doing lord knows what to her."
I ran as fast as my legs could go. I soon caught up with Kris (She had stopped to put on her bikini top) and hand in hand we ran to her campsite. Out of breath we got there just as her Dad had finished cooking some fish on the grill. He was so drunk he didn't seem to notice us arriving looking like we had just ran a race. He offered me a plate of fish and a Pepsi. My heart was still racing, only now from fear.
I kept staring down the road waiting for my Dad's car to come. While I waited Kris's Dad told her maybe she should put some clothes on over her bathing suit. She was shaking so much she had to be cold.
No, No I thought. Not more clothes. Less clothes. Less clothes. That's where we wanted to go.
About 15 minutes after we arrived I saw a car coming slowly down the road. It was my Dad's. I pretended to ignore it until he drove right by me.
"TOM!"
I turned around and acted surprised to see him. "Dad you're back. Thank God." In the back seat I saw my sister sitting there with her arms folded.
"Did you know what your sister was doing?"
"Yes sir. She was throwing a party. I tried to stop it but she would wouldn't listen. So I came back here because I didn't want to be around all that."
Mr Fisher saw Dad and waved at him. "Hell of a good boy you got there Gene!" I smiled saintly. Rose looked like she wanted to vomit. Dad had a thoughtful look then said, "Ok I'm taking Rose with me. Can I trust you alone here for a couple more days?"
My smile grew. "Of course. No parties for me Dad."
"Ok head back to the house and clean up the mess she left there. And no Parties!" Dad pulled away. As the car went down the road Rose turned around and gave me a hateful look until they had faded from sight.
I turned and looked at Kris and said, "Well you heard the man. Back to the house."
Kris however wanted nothing to do with my house any longer. "The mood's ruined. Besides what if he comes back?" Nothing would change her mind. She wasn't going back into that house again.
I was very sad.
Kris lifted my mood when she asked if I'd rather go skinny dipping instead.
"I guess", I said reluctantly.
Thank God there was a full moon out that night.

The Passion Of Teddy
This has nothing to do with anything, but in a life full of strange events this was just plain .......weird.
In the summer of 1984 my friend Tim and I were driving around killing some time before I had to head home for the day. We took some back roads and ended up out in the country by some farms we had never been by before.
As we were driving Tim got a strange look on his face. He slowed the car down and pulled over by the side of the road.
"What is it?" I asked.
Tim said nothing. He got out of the car with that same strange expression on his face. He seemed to be staring right above himself. I thought maybe Tim was having some weird religious experience or something. I got out and looked in the direction Tim was.
There hanging from the top of a telephone pole in front of me was a Teddy Bear. It looked as if the Bear had been crucified to the pole.
"Whoa", I said. "That's just messed up."
Tim pulled the car closer so we could stand on the hood and try to reach the poor Bear. As Tim was standing on his tip toes about to reach up and grab the Bear, a old man came running out of the house down the road from us. In his hand was a shotgun.
"Get away from that Bear!", he shouted. He aimed the rifle straight in the air and fired one shot off. Tim and I scrambled back in the car and peeled out never looking back.
I never had the courage to go back and look for Teddy. I've often wondered what that Bear did to piss that old farmer of like that.

Cold Dish Warm Dish

From my July 22 2003 post entitled Fun At Home
"When I was six, I remember standing in the hallway by the top of the stairs. To my left I could look into Geno and John's bedroom. Geno lay on his bed reading a book. I looked into his room for a few seconds until Geno saw me.
"What are you looking at ?" He said.
I smiled at Geno.
Then I threw myself down the stairs. I believe I managed to hit every step on the way down. All the way down those steps I screamed bloody murder. As I hit the bottom my parents came running in from the kitchen. Geno now stood at the top of the stairs trying to figure out what happened.
Mom and Dad picked me up and asked me what happened.
"Geno (sob) threw(sob)me (sob) down the stairs!(sob sob) AND HE LAUGHED AT ME!"( I thought that was a really good touch)
Dad narrowed his eyes and looked up the stairs at Geno who was now holding his hands up in a "Not me " gesture and backing down the hallway. Dad handed me to Mom and began to walk up the stairs.
"Think you're a big man for picking on a little boy half your size?!" As Dad marched up the stairs he took his belt off. "Are you trying to break the boy in 5 pieces? We've just put him back together! "
I'm not sure how bad he whipped Geno, but Geno gave me dirty looks for the few weeks. I just smiled sweetly back at him, content in my knowledge that he couldn't touch me."
Geno never forgot what I had done to him that night. For a couple of years afterwards he would sometimes bring it up and glare at me. Everytime he did I would only smile at him. Sweetly.
Geno eventually forgot about it (I assumed) and life moved on. In the summer of 1978, when I was 13 we lived in the small town of Atkinson Illinois. Dad was now the head administrator of the Good Shepard Foundation a clinic on Alcohol and Drug Abuse. For that summer Dad got Mom a job as some sort of secretary there.
This meant that during the days I was left pretty much alone. I spent the long lazy days that summer either riding my bike to the canal to go fishing, or just riding around looking for girls. When I wasn't roaming on my bike I spent many an hour in my backyard pretending I was a jedi.
At some point during that summer Geno was laid off from his factory job. This upset me greatly because I had to now share my empty house with him.
Dad was constantly on Geno's case about finding another job, and to get a haircut. The result was that Geno was always in a bad mood.
One summer night my other brother John was joking around and started talking about all the trouble we had gotten each other into. He soon started joking about the time I threw myself down the stairs to get Geno into trouble. Everyone laughed at the memory.
Except Geno.
The next day Geno sat around the house brooding. When Mom and Dad came home from lunch Dad asked Geno if he had even bothered to look for a Job. Geno made a smart comment back to Dad and soon they were yelling at each other. When Mom and Dad went back to work Dad told Geno he had better have a job by the end of the week. I smiled thoughout the entire time.
A little after Mom and Dad left Geno walked upstairs to our bedroom. ( I had to share a room with Geno and John.) He was only up there a few minutes when I heard him say ,"Hey Tom come up real quick I want to show you something."
I went to the stairs and looked up. Geno was standing at the top looking into our bedroom. "What is it?"
"Quiet", he said. Come up here before it goes away."
Now I was curious. I slowly walked up the stairs. When I got up to the top I looked into my bedroom. I saw nothing out of the ordinary. I turned to Geno to ask what he had seen.
Before I could say anything however I felt his hands shove me. Suddenly I found myself tumbling down the stairs. And as I fell I could hear him laughing at me."Well that was stupid of me", I thought.
When I hit the bottom I heard Geno shout out, "Hah! Not so funny now is it?!"
I didn't move.
"Tom?"
I stayed still. I heard Geno come halfway down the stairs. He stopped. "Stop fooling around!"
I lay there face down my legs still on the bottom two stairs. I heard Geno run back up the stairs. A minute later he came back down and stood next to me. "Tom?"
It took every bit of self control (and let me tell you 13 year olds don't have much.) to not break out laughing. He gave me a little shove. Again I stayed still. Geno must have stayed next to me for a couple of minutes more but then I heard the front door open and him leave.
I waited just a little more then I moved. I was very very sore. Not only had falling down the stairs hurt me a little but laying there for the last few minutes had left me very stiff. I moved around for a little laughing at how stupid Geno was.
I went upstairs and looked in the mirror. I had a nice sized bump right below my hairline. I sat on the top stairs and thought about what to do next. It was close to the time when Mom and Dad were coming home that it hit me.
I went into my parents room and found where Dad had his Playboys stashed.(It was the worst kept secret in our house.) I took a couple out and went to my bedroom. I threw the Playboys on Geno's bed.
I then went downstairs and waited by the front window for Mom and Dad to come home. It was another 30 minutes or so when Mom and Dad finally pulled in front of the house. I ran over to the bottom of the stairs and lay back down like I had fallen down the stairs.
When Mom and Dad came in I could hear Mom scream. They ran over to me and shook me. "Tom? Tom?! What happened?"
I slowly opened my eyes and did my best to look confused.
"What happened? Where's Geno?"
"Geno", I said slowly,"Went nuts Dad."
I then told a story about how I had walked upstairs and went to my room. When I opened the door I said, I saw Geno on his bed with his pants down holding a Playboy in his hand. Geno was so enraged at me he came running over and shoved me. I fell down the stairs and didn't remember anything else until Mom and Dad walked into the house.
"Why would he do something like that?" I asked weakly. Dad ran up the stairs and went into my room. He came out a moment later with his two Playboys in his hand.
"Where did he get those?" My Mom asked. There was a lot of anger in her voice.
"I don't know", Dad said. "I'm not sure where you can buy these." Dad looked very uncomfortable.
The rest of the day was paradise. I lay in bed reading comic books and whatever I asked for my parents got me. When Mom asked me if I was going to be ok, I smiled sweetly at her and nodded yes.
Geno was gone from that house for months. After that day Dad would only call him "that little Jerk Off." Geno vowed to get me back for that. I only reminded him what happened the last time he tried to get me back.
And bless his heart, Geno kept trying to get his revenge.

Sometimes Revenge Is Ok When Served Steaming Hot
On my 23 birthday in 1987 I met a woman at a bar/restaurant who shared my birthday down to the hour. Considering she was very hot and sexy, and I wasn't seeing anyone (other than the girl who took me to the bar) I saw it as a sign from God to date her.
Darci was 4 feet 11 inches of looks and attitude standing in 5 inch heels. When we started dating I told her I had been dumped a year ago by my fiance and that there was nothing worse than that. She told me she was going to break my heart. I told her she'd have to find it and piece it together first. Only then could she break it.
Darci being a handmaiden of Satan spent the next 9 months doing just that.
Our breakup was more a meltdown. When it was over I found out that there were indeed worse things then being dumped by a fiance. After my breakup with Darci (who really was hot in a sexy "I'm going destroy you"sort of way.) I moved away to college.
Soon after I met a lovely young woman named Dana. Dana was without doubt the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen up to that time in my life. She was a 5 foot 8 , red haired , green eyed, beauty green who told me she was the third runner up in the Miss Illinois pageant. (I found out later it was a lie, but the important thing was that she looked like she could have been the third runner up.) I found a great happiness with Dana.
For almost 6 weeks.
During a local town festival in my home town another good friend of mine named Shelly bumped into Darci. Darci asked how I was doing. Shelly who never liked Darci very much told her, "He's great. He's got a new girlfriend who's everything you are not. Tall beautiful, nice and so sexy he'd never want to be with someone like you again."
I wish I had been told about that conversation at the time. It would have made my life immensely easier.
Darci hearing that immediately took it as a challenge. Three days later she tracked me down to my school, and telling me that she had realized I was the love of her life wanted me back.
Dana was incredibly pretty with a body that could have easily made it into Playboy. So of course I cheated on her with Darci.(I was a frigging idiot) And of course Darci made sure Dana knew. To my surprise Darci's new found love for me faded about the same time Dana dumped me.
So I went from 2 girls fighting over me to drinking alone at a bar in the matter of 2 days. Darci would occasionally come down to see me but I knew there was no future in it any longer.
One night Dana came in with a new boyfriend. He was 18 years old and named Phillip. When she introduced him too me she said, "Phillip knows something good when he sees it. He'd never sleep with a little sawed of troll like Darci."
My only comment was, "You know, every other Phillip I know is gay."
A week or so later when Darci was back down to see me (Just to make sure my life was still screwed over) I mentioned off handedly Dana's comment. Darci's face hardened and she said, "Really? I'd like to see this Phillip." I took Darci to the bar where Phillip's Frat hung out.(All very clean shaven gay looking young men.) To Phillips great misfortune Dana had stayed home that night.
Darci looked at him in much the same way a Cat looks at a mouse. With a small smile on her face she told me to go home. "I'll be there in a couple of hours." Feeling almost a little sorry for Phillip I left.
From what I understand it took Darci all of 10 or 15 minutes to pick Phillip up and leave with him, (In her car.) to the local Holiday Inn on the edge of town.
Once in their room Darci told Phillip she only liked really clean men. Darci pouted her lip and asked Phillip, "You wouldn't mind taking a shower would you? I might join you in a few minutes if you would." Phillip tore his clothes off and jumped into the shower. "Make the water nice and hot", Darci said as she picked up all of Phillips clothes (Leaving only his socks and shoes) and headed out the door. On the way out she took the phone and placed it by the ice machine down the hall.
A few minutes later there was a knock on Dana's dorm room. When Dana answered the door Darci wordlessly handed Dana Phillip's clothes and the key to the room. Darci came over to my apartment where we enjoyed a lovely night together.
The next day Dana came over to my place and blamed me for what had happened the night before. Before I could plead my case Darci came to the door naked and asked Dana if she'd like to come in. Dana turned down Darci's kind invitation. It was the last time we would ever speak.
A couple months later realizing the was no way I could screw up my college life any worse then I already had I was getting ready to move (flee) away. I was in a bar a few nights before I left when Phillip came in. When he saw me he came over and said, "I should kick your ass for what you did to me!" (Again blaming me!)
I looked at him. He seemed to have aged horribly in the last two months. A classic sign of having been near Darci. "Phil you can stand there and scream at me or you can sit down and I'll buy you a drink." Phillip considered carefully and soon we were talking about our exgirlfriends. I bought Phillip at least 5 drinks that night. I'd like to think we bonded somewhat. There's something about being with Darci that you can only share with another man who has been with her. It's like sharing a near death experience.
Towards the end of the night I bought Phillip a 6 pack of beer. I put my arm around him and said ,"It's a Hernandez family tradition Phil. I'm leaving soon and want you to finish this after I'm gone." I took one can and opened it a drank a big drink.
I walked Phillip to his newer sporty red car and said, "You finish this when you get back to you place, ok?"
Phillip looking like he was about to cry just grabbed my hand and nodded. "Hey I was expecting my friend here. He's late. Could you wait a moment while I call to see if he's coming. If he's not could you give me a ride home?" My new friend nodded and I went back into the bar.
There I called the police gave them my location and described Phillip's car and plate number. "He's driving like a madman screaming about how evil woman are. I'm afraid he's going to hurt someone. If you hurry you might catch him."
I went outside and told Phillip, "Hey I'm cool man, you drive safe." As Phillip pulled out of the parking lot I could hear sirens in the distance.
I'm sure Phillip blames me for the ticket he got that night as well.

My Dad's Easter Humor
I don't really have a funny story to go with this (yet), but the night before Easter was a tense night for me as a young boy. As we would get ready for bed my Dad would make a big show of locking the doors and windows and screaming for everyone to hear,"If that damn rabbit breaks in tonight I'm going to shoot him! We'll have rabbit stew for Easter one of these years if it's the last thing I do!"
For the Happiness and Joy of children all across the world I'm glad to announce that the Easter Bunny was able to safely get in and out of our house without being seriously wounded. Somehow it made the candy the next day all the sweeter.

My Easter Humor
In High School for art class one year I was painting a very nice picture of Christ being crucified. Under the cross I had the Virgin Mary weeping with some other women, some Roman soldiers standing around holding spears, and on the ground in front of the cross was a few Easter eggs. In the background was the Easter Bunny hopping away, with a few Roman centurions vainly giving chase.
Sadly the oil painting vanished soon after Easter that year.
When my Dad saw I was painting a picture of Christ he was at first thrilled. After years of drawing and painting things he didn't understand here at last was something he could hang on his wall. When he saw the Easter Bunny included shortly after he became less then happy. The wall remained bare.
But honestly it was better than my first attempt.
My first attempt was the Easter Bunny being crucified. I had a little Easter basket laying at the foot of the cross with some eggs spilling out. I even made one of the centurions look remarkably like Dad. In one of the very few times my art teacher gave me direction I was advised to "tone " it down. Some of the younger elementary kids were "disturbed" by the painting.
But honestly it wasn't because of that I changed it. I was having a hard time making blood on white rabbit fur look real. So I decided just to have him in the background.

And the sad thing is Dad never understood where my sense of humor came from.
Easter Oddities
They don't make them anymore, but as a child one of my favorite Easter candies was a Chocolate cross with Jesus on it.
I loved Chocolate Jesus. I would eat the cross first, then start with his feet, I would eat my way to his knees, and then start on his hands. Eventually all that was left of Chocolate Jesus was his head. The entire time I spent eating him I would, in a low voice, say things like, "No don't eat me, please stop. Not my feet! ahhhhhhhhhh!" Mom and Dad would stare at me in shocked silience.
Later at Church when the Priest would eventually get around to the whole, "drink of my blood, eat of my flesh" stuff, I would just sit there and nod and smile.
I miss Chocolate Jesus. But at least for Christmas there is still a Candy Santa or two floating around. ( I eat his head first. I don't want my kids to hear the muffled screams of Santa. Might upset them.)

Not Really A Post.....More A Question Actually
Started a couple of part time jobs here recently, so sorry for the lack of updates. Once I get on a better schedule that'll change. One is a fun rewarding job. The other ...Well if you didn't know better you'd probably think I was working off some community service. However the hours are right for what I need.
Anyway the point of this...Drivel.
Starting a couple months ago my friends started making comments to me. At first I thought they were cute. However the more people are saying it to me the more I wonder about me. Here's just an example.
My Friend Tim; "Wow. I'd never want to cross you. You'd wait years to get at me. But you are the type of guy I'd call if I ever woke up with a dead hooker in my bed and needed to get rid of the body. Of course you'd hold it over me for the rest of my life."
Jeff; "If anyone knew you, they'd know that no matter what you will get your revenge. No matter what it takes."
Mark; " You get obsessed with payback sometimes. I'd never want to be on your bad side. (Well actually that wasn't exactly what he said, but it was close. I'm sure Mark will leave a comment clarifying it.)
My nephew has said something close to what the others said, and even my sister gave what she must have considered a compliement when she said, "You're a devious little guy aren't you? If I ever need help screwing someone over I'll give you a call." (Her statement is a little misleading. She would never need any help.)
Anyway I just considered it a little strange pick me up speech from all my friends. However lately I've bumped into people I haven't seen in years. After a little talk they've all made simerler comments too me. The last time was yesterday at Wal-Mart. (where all truly deep conversations takes place it seems.) When the woman made the comment to me I asked what she meant by that. All she did was wink at me and walk away.
SO my question is, what the heck are you talking about my friends. (the few who read this that is.) As far as I can remember I've left no bodies buried in strange (corn)fields. I can't remember doing anything (under this name) that was illegal (in this state.) against anyone I've considered an enemy( that has been proven in any court of law.) So please refrain from making comments like that about me.
Or I swear by all thats holy I'll get you for that.

PLease don't bring up any thing where the Statute of Limitations may have expired.

April Fools.
(I know ...a day late.)
When I was 22 I lived with my parents. For a short time I worked at Hardees. My shifts was 5-8 and 11-2. I hated it for many reasons, not the least was the 3 hour wait between shifts. I would show up in the morning and help clean up the place before it got busy with the morning breakfast rush.
Since I worked weekend mornings , and usually didn't like to have to rush back home from wherever it was that I found myself on those early morning hours, I usually kept a spare uniform in the store. A vast majority of my time working there I was either hung over or sleep deprived.
To say I took the job less then seriously would be a vast understatement. I would show up seconds before I to clock in and clock out the first minute I could.
I once worked at a Nursing Home where an old woman's foot fell apart. I hated my job at Hardees worse than that one.
On April First 1987 my alarm clock rang and woke me up. I turned it off and stumbled out of bed. I somehow got myself dressed and drank a can of Coke to help wake me up.
Less then 8 minutes after I woke up I staggered out the door and began the long walk to work. About half way there I woke up a little. I remember thinking how cold it was that morning. About 15 minutes after I left home I found myself walking up to the entrance of Hardees.
Everything was dark. I tried the door.
Locked.
Maybe the manager was late this morning, I thought. I looked in the window at the clock by the counter.
It said 3.57.
3.57? What the heck?
I was an hour early. Cussing everystep, I walked home. I made it in time to sit down, relax for about 20 minutes, and head back out to Hardees. Sooner then I would have liked I back, this time the manager was there.
That day went especially long for me. Finally it was 8 and I could go home for 3 hours until it was time to head back. I walked home still wondering how my clock could have been set ahead an hour. I got there around 8.15. Mom and Dad were in the kitchen. I came in to grab a bite to eat.
As I sat down Dad looked at me and without cracking a smile said," Did you make it too work on time? It's important to show up when you are supposed to."
I stared at him with my mouth slightly open. He did it too me. The old sadistic jerk. I knew he would never admit it, but all the same he wanted to let me know it was him.
Before I could say anything he left the kitchen and went to work. I sat there vowing revenge. Next Year I vowed, I'll get him back.
All Year I plotted and schemed. Finally the week before April 1st I understood.
Nothing I could do would ever match that. He had beaten me. It was time to bow before the Master.
Besides he would have killed me if I really did anything to him.