Religion
I love Easter.
Even for more than just the memory of chocolate Jesus. (see last years Easter blog)
No I love this time of year because it's always a nice time to reflect on God and his plan for me.
Sadly that plan seems to involve sneaking over to my house while I'm sleeping and burning it down. There was also his sick little joke last year of having my wife who hates Star Wars get addicted to a Star Wars on-line massive multi role playing game and running off with some guy she met there. Of course she ran away after she married him in the game.
And I understood it. I knew that God asked himself, "What would be the most ironic way to end Tom's marriage?" And while I'm sure Satan had a nice little reply about me being eaten by a runaway circus Bear on a tricycle ,God thought the whole Star Wars gag was funny and went with that.
Nope God and I get along.
As long as I stay more then 1000 yards away from him per the restraining order he took out on me.
What I can't stand are other people telling me what God is thinking or what his plan is for me. I've really started to despise much of organized religion.
This whole Terri Schiavo thing for instance pisses me off. Somehow the religious right has made this their Cause Of The Day.
I have an opinion on the subject. A strong one. And it doesn't matter one damn bit what it is.
It's a family matter.
We, the news, the government, and the media shouldn't be in it.
They've turned this woman's death into a circus, all promoting whatever cause they believe in and attaching it to this poor brain dead woman.
And make no mistake. She's a vegetable. Her brain has the thickness of a good soup.
She's been gone for 15 years. She can't eat, can't drink, can't dream, can't feel pain, and certainly can't register to vote.
I know if it was me in that condition I'd certainly want to be let go. I told my now Ex Wife that. So I'm sure that if I was in that condition I'd hope she'd let me go.
(You know somehow I don't that would be a long decision on her part.)
But back to the point at hand.
In this circus you've got everyone from the Right To Life people somehow linking abortion to this, to every politician with a religious base tripping over themselves to make sure someone knows they tried to save this poor defenseless woman from a fate worse than life. Every person with any sort of cause that they can link to this woman is jumping in front of a TV Camera and screaming, "I'm here for Terri!" Meanwhile the husband is being cast as a vegetable beating murderer who just wants to knock off his loving wife. Apparently some of these nuts think that if he truly loved her and just kissed her she'd wake up. Of course these are the same people who think Science is just a lot of hocus pocus.
It actually scares me when I hear some of the stuff I hear these days. It reminds me of the days when astronomers told of a universe where the Earth wasn't in the center. Religious leaders wanted to hear nothing of it. Couple of people got branded as heretics for that and burned at the stake.
Of course we live in a much more enlightened age.
Of course that believe went flying out the window when they got John Edwards to speak as expert on Fox News.
No not the former VP candidate. The speaking to the dead guy from cable and the sci fi channel show.
God this is a scary time to live in.

The Call Of Nature
Once when I worked for Wal-Mart (the borg of our world) I had to stand outside during a pleasant early morning , watching the items we had for our side walk sale, and making sure nothing was stolen overnight.
At about 3 in the morning a car pulled up and two gentlemen get out. One went into the store and the other stood by their car. I watched the man who was obviously in a very drunken state. He looked around trying to see if anyone was watching him. When he was satisfied that no one was he walked over to another car, unzipped his pants and began to urinate on the drivers side door. I picked up my walkie talkie and told the third shift manager what was happening and asked if she'd call the police.
"Tom,", Betty said, "If I call the police he'll be gone by time they get here."
"Ok", I said, "But I just wanted to let you know that it's your car he's taking a whiz on."
One minute and 38 seconds later while his friend was still in the store I saw two town cops with their lights on come into our parking lot.
When Betty came out to go home she got into the passenger side door. She did not look happy.
Just a thought for those of you that might be doing some late night-early morning shopping.

No One Takes Pride In Their Work Anymore

One of my Jobs at my School is to help grade the occasional homework. Last Friday I was Helping the Math teacher do some grading. The nice thing about the math books is that in the back are all the odd question's answers. So that the kids if they have even the smallest bit of intelligence can always get at the very least 50% of the questions right.
Two of the papers I graded had this as the answer for number 37
"Students Answers will vary. Please see page 168 for more details."
When questioned by the teacher both students said that, yes indeed they worked the problem and that was the answer they came up with.
I took much more pride in my cheating when I was young.
But I'm not like that anymore.

Over

Yesterday at 9.32 in the morning my marriage to my wife quietly ended in a courtroom in Cambridge Illinois. It had been a day long coming.
I had long imagined what I would say when it was over. There had been times when I would think gleefully of spiteful things to say to her. I was sure I would feel a sense of victory.
But standing a few steps behind her while she told the Judge she agreed to our terms for divorce I felt no such sense. I felt strangely empty. My life for the last 15 months had centered around this divorce. Everything I did was in one way or another a reaction to it. Now that it was over I am unsure of my next steps.
I hold no hatred or even anger towards my ex wife. ( wow....First time I've thought of her that way.) That has long since faded away. While I strongly disagree with many of the choices she has made they were hers to make. Also I have to admit I like myself much better now than I did 15 months ago. I like were my life is at and where it's headed. If she had not done what she had done I would still be unhappy and can only guess that so would she. My feelings for her are complicated but she is the mother of my kids and I truly hope the best for her.
My original plans for celebrating the end of this divorce was to treat myself with a nice dinner out of town and some quiet time to myself. But I was I leaving the courthouse I turned the car around and drove the 20 minutes back to my home and the children I had fought for. I spent the day and the night with them. We didn't do anything special. We watched a movie on DVD. I helped Ethan build a castle for a school project. ( One which he knew about 3 weeks ago and only told me about 5 days ago. Thanks a whole heap there buddy!)I read a story to Isaac. When the night was over I stood in their doorway and watched them sleeping in their bed. At that moment I felt truly grateful and realized I had indeed won a victory.
I'm unsure of my next step. I like my life now. For the first time in my life I don't feel the need to have someone to complete me. I won't rush into anything. When the time is right everything will fall into place. I do have faith that I will find someone.
I truly like the quiet moments in my life now.